KILLERS
A killer rampaging a town,
Ran into a carnival clown.
The clown drew a knife
And took that man’s life,
Then started a spree of his own!
July 16, 2011
~
THE WITCH AND THE BURGLAR
A witch riding home on her broom
Spied a burglar trashing her room.
“I’ll get you for this!” she said with a hiss.
His head was soon found in Khartoum.
July 17, 2011
~
AN UPPITY CAT
A cat who liked veggies and cheese,
Refused to eat mouse canapes.
“I just can’t abide that tough, hairy hide.
I’d rather eat onions and peas!”
July 16, 2011
~
LIZZIE BORDEN
When Lizzie got awfully mad,
She hacked up her stepmom and dad.
The ax at her feet, she giggled and bleat,
“Why am I so terribly bad!”
September 26, 2011
~
The Sorcerer from Beijing
A sorcerer born in Beijing,
Found a magical jade dragon ring.
It breathed out green smoke,
Transforming that bloke
To a blood-thirsty cannibal king!
July 14, 2011
~
LIZZIE BORDEN II
When Lizzie got awfully mad,
She hacked up her stepmom and Dad.
Amazed by the mess, she had to confess:
“What a rip-roaring party we had!”
September 27, 2011
~
The Sorcerer from Beijing II
A sorcerer born in Beijing,
Found a magical jade dragon ring.
It breathed out green fire, burning all his attire
Except for one shoe and stocking!
July 7, 2011
~
The Man in Galloway Bay II
A man lost in Galloway Bay,
Cried out in a very loud bray,
“I’m lost in the sea, someone please rescue me!
I’ve been swimming for more than a day!”
July 7, 2011
~
The Old Man from Brazil II
There was an old man from Brazil,
Who ate ‘til he made himself ill.
He gave up the ghost, said good-bye to his host,
And flew home to his house on the hill.
July 7, 2011
~
A Nasty Old Gnome
A nasty old gnome name o’ Bill
Liked to puncture old teeth with a drill.
He gathered some bones from the graveyard he owns,
But that skeleton wouldn’t sit still!
February 5, 2012
~
The Man in Galloway Bay III
A man lost in Galloway Bay,
Cried out in a very loud bray,
“I’m lost in the sea,
Someone please rescue me!
The fishermen think I’m filet!”
July 7, 2011
~
All limericks by:
Dawn Pisturino
March 10, 2022
Copyright 2011-2022 Dawn Pisturino. All Rights Reserved.
Dawn Pisturino's Blog 
These are great LOL…I like Lizzie Borden…she was cool ,👍👍
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Thanks, Jim!
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😊😊
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There once was a man from Port Dover/ Who feared that his life might be over/ He turned 98/ And said, This is great! / It looks like my life isn’t over (old style limerick)
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That’s really cute, Jim! Thank you!
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Aww thanks 😇😇
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His Mama was always the one
With wisdom second to none
“Now off to the store
I’m in need of some more
So run, Forrest, run my son”
But Mama, why you lookin’ so glum?
I got what you wanted, then some
I’ve been to the Rockies
Got boxes of choccies …
“No son, I said Rum, Forrest … RUM!”
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I love this! Thank you!
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My RESPECT!! You are the Limerick Queen in my eyes!! LOL Fabulous and perfect limericks!!
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Thank you, Karima, I appreciate your feedback very much. Glad you liked them!
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Loved them!!
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something wicked that way came
and all the same
few to none noticed
as round and round they
went caliope
merry went round
hell bent bound
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Wow! That was great! Thanks!
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Girlfriend, you are the Limerick Queen!!! 🤣😆😜😅😂😝 Honey, these are definitely some Killer Limericks!!! 🪓🩸🔪 I can’t believe the movie Leprechaun is almost 30 years old! ☘☘☘
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LOL! Thanks, Kym! Have a leprechaun-free night!
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LOL and you too Dawn!!! 😝☘😱
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Thanks for your likes of my articles on the prophecies of Daniel; you are very kind.
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So creative and chilling! Lizzie is going to give me nightmares!
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Yes, she was definitely creepy! Thank you, Michele!
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She certainly was. 😨 You are welcome. Enjoy your weekend!
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thank you, I simply love to read limericks and they are all exceptional!
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Thank you so much! I’m glad to hear from you.
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Happy St. Patrick’s!🍀 Thanks for this blog! It’s the BEST!
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Why, thank you! I’m honored by your comment. Thanks for visiting!
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You were killing it in 2011!
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Thanks, Geoff!
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Good compilation
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Thank you very much!
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These were fun! Pretty much the “random lol” category.
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Thank you, Balladeer!
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